So, after New Year's, I joined a gym for the first time in my life. Considering that I quit taking phys/ed classes after grade 9, this has been a bit of a shock to the system. But I've been keeping up with it and not dreading it.

I'm going three times a week, twice with a workout routine, once just for cardio. It's a women-only gym on my way to work. 7 minute walk from home, 7 minute walk from work. It has private bathrooms and showers, which cuts a lot of the intimidation of the gym. I haven't had to wait for equipment and there are no sign-up lists.

I've done personal training twice, which has been interesting. Last Thursday, we made my workout harder because it wasn't kicking my ass anymore. It is definitely kicking my ass again, and my legs are sore today from doing the new routine last night.

I have noticed that the last 3 weeks are the first time that I've been critical of certain parts of my body. I've always heard women complain about jiggly fat under their arms, and I've just shrugged my shoulders. Then I get to spend an hour in front of a mirror with a personal trainer with the most toned arms I've ever seen on a woman. I would be tempted to claim they were photoshopped, if they weren't right there in front of me. And then we pan back to my arms. My untoned arms that are struggling to lift tiny weights and oh-! A jiggle! Oh God!

So now I realise where all that insecurity comes from. When I was dicking around on the Internet for years, other girls were staring at themselves in mirrors while working out. So, I'm trying not to get hyper-focused on that part. I'd just like to be in decent shape for the first time since I was a little kid who rode bikes and climbed trees and dug snow tunnels without getting tired or sore. I think it's going to take a while. :)

Labels: gym, working out

I've been giggling at this comic for a few days now. :)

Labels: babies, comic

So, not a lot has changed in my life in the last month, but my intrusive anxious thoughts have *poof!* disappeared! Bizarre. It took me a while to notice that they were gone, like when you notice many hours later that your horrible headache is gone.

My stress level hasn't changed and I haven't become a zen master, no. But my BIRTH CONTROL has changed. For the uninitiated, there are two main types of hormonal birth control: combined estrogen and progesterone, and progesterone-only. A short list:

Combined estrogen and progesterone:
- most types of the pill
- the patch
- the ring (Nuvaring)

Progesterone-only:
- the shot (Depo Provera)
- the mini-pill
- the intra-uterine system (Mirena—the copper IUD has no hormones)

Unlike most people who can give you horror stories, my body LOVED the shot. But it causes bone density loss, so I went off it. Onto the Nuvaring, which gave me side effects galore. Now to Mirena, and suddenly all my intrusive thoughts are gone. Thank you, Nuvaring, for messing with my mind for the last 6 months!

So there you go. Progesterone-only is the new law of the land.

Labels: anxiety, birth control

Julia Sweeney takes us through her experiences with Catholicism, Buddhism, Deepak Chopra, and eventual atheism. Terribly funny and true to life. There are two moments in particular that rang very true to me: talking to the Mormon boys and realising their story wasn't any less ridiculous than her Catholic story, and quietly realising in panic that she didn't believe in God anymore.

I like stories like this much better than the Dawkins approach. I think it's important to show the true motives and process behind deconversion and the benefits of atheism while maintaining respect for belief.

Part 1:


Part 2:


Part 3:


Part 4:

Labels: religion